Airports

So long have I tried to get it right

Title stories that are not mine

Where stories come together and

Travel in tubes

Leather bracelets, running mascara,

French phrases on American shirts,

Jury duty

 

Most of all

A tattoo

Crawling out of his shirt

Hugging his neck

A wing or a tail

To an alluding creature

 

Hum of travel voices

Messages tingling in pockets

Rushed with baggage

And gates

 

A tattoo

We all have them

Stories

Peering from the neckline

And choking our throats.

(possibly unfinished)

Exposure

Inspiration is a funny thing. It tends to hit you at the most bizarre times. Even now, I am copying my thoughts from the back cover of a borrowed book, because I was not near my computer when the sudden itch to write crawled into my mind.

I have experienced little inspiration since my initial desire to create this blog, until tonight. The topic occupying my thoughts for the past week is my tendency for people-pleasing. I accredit my lack of writing to either my obsession and thus continued action in this or my contemplation of it. My revelation tonight was a cure, maybe not the only cure but one I saw that could help me heal. This cure is exposure. By exposure, I mean allowing myself to spill out and be me.

I recognize now, that I must make something very clear. People-pleasing can be a good thing. It is important to seek the happiness of others. However, I speak of the negative kind. The kind that controls a person and makes them lose themselves in a horrible game of trying to be someone they are not in order to make others happy. If only those who struggled with this obsessive behavior could see it for what it really is….I am still learning its features in my own life. I have discovered the obessed people-pleasers are not good friends at all, me included. They can be fake and share only what they feel others want to hear. You see, this kind of people-pleasing is rooted in fear. Fear that who we really are will not be enough or “right” for the people around us. If we live with this perspective, we tiptoe through life wondering if our every thought is too harsh for our so-called friends. As people-pleasers, could we even consider them our friends? Clearly they do not truly know us and that is our own fault.

In the recent past I was accused of being too agreeable. This made me recognize my tendency to lack a genuine spirit. Have I been pretending just to make my friends happy? I challenge fellow people-pleasers to try exposure. I want to be real and speak my mind when the situation calls for it. I believe everyone, even people-pleasers, provide new perspectives to every situation whether their input is positive reinforcement or critical recommendations. If our friends don’t accept our encouragement along with our criticisms they are not friends at all. Also, if we allow this fear to have a foothold in our lives it is a detriment to our relationships. Eventually, people will see our fear and recognize our lack of genuine concern for others. We are all called to challenge one another not just make each other feel nice. True friends encourage but also provide constructive criticism when a friend is in the wrong.

So, this is me. Exposing. This is my struggle. Exposed.

I feel the Lord is teaching me some things about myself and this is only the beginning. I hope to produce some follow-up posts on this topic. I also look forward to finding some scriptures to encourage myself and others who may share this same struggle. I know it tends to be a popular one but also subtle and that is part of the reason I wanted to write about it here. It is so easy to caught in this mess that often feels right but isn’t. “Too agreeable” can be dangerous in that it is a subtle portal to lies rather than revealing the truth through true character.

18th Century Courtship

Silence and courtesy

Marry her

Not a man

Just submission

 

Mother and father devise

Happy unions dreamt

Cheery youth tease

Ignorant of destiny

 

Stomachs drop in silent groans

As false smiles graze lips,

Shifting eyes search,

And glowing gowns prick appetites

 

Dance across the floor

With silent minds, silent throats,

And broken beating hearts

 

Seduction one-sided

Submission invited

Expected by all

Fulfilled by none,

Wholeheartedly

 

Top hats hide proposals

Corsets and fans flirt falsely

Hands are requested

And empty hearts wander

 

Lacking what we all call love.

Baby

A dirty white pickup

Bears three broken hearts

And the baby

 

A t-shirt proclaims

The title she won’t claim

And the baby

 

The man

Drowns in clouds of smoke

Unaccepting of his title

And the baby

 

The woman

Now a shadow in a high

He calls life

And the baby.

 

Broken blood burrows under skin

He won’t remember

Fists replace kisses

And the baby.

 

Man drowning in syringes and seduction

Woman slowly dying

And the baby.

 

Harvests his heartache

Stitched, end to end

And the baby.

 

Meets her

Tapped scars turn to nerve

And the baby.

 

He’s the player in the game of a father

She’s the victim once like mother

And the baby. 

Waves

Softly serenading skin

                        Sensation, elation

Peace

Trickling trolls litter the surface

Cracking, crying, breaking

Breaking liquid glass

Beneath them,

Quiet wives await

Twirling return,

Embrace.

City life and traffic team

Beneath

Lovers blue,

Lace and sun-kissed trim

Caressing reef,

Whispering ripples

Sands tickle tummies

Return

Twice as strong

Separate, one                                                                                       Again.

Once Upon A Time

 

A time

Singular

Just once

And it’s gone.

 

The lion in its den

The mother knits

The knight shines

The girl cries

The orphan lost.

 

Chapter by chapter

Action, adventure

Romance and mystery,

Created.

 

Reality on paper,

Already once discovered

Read to relive

And excite.

 

Once upon a time,

Time was upon us

Not to find in a book

But to live.

 

Times like these

Nothing noteworthy

 

These are the times that are timeless.

Beginning Scribbles…

Poetry, prose, lyrics, essays, articles, novels, magazines, newspapers, blogs, facebook, twitter. We are surrounded by words. The power of words is so often overlooked and this should frighten us. William Wordsworth, Samuel T. Coleridge, JAne Austen, Alfred Lord Tennyson, Charles Darwin, Charles Dickens, Virginia Woolf, and Joseph Conrad are only some of many influential writers who shaped and taught society how to live. Hitler attempted to manipulate society with Mein Kampf. Martin Luther King Jr. changed society’s perspective with his speech of equality. These are only a few examples of the power of words at work. Our generation must nurture the words we are given and develop our voice. We must defeat complacency and seize the opportunity to make a difference.